Greetings, Trend-setters,
No matter what the year or season, there's always something
'in' and something 'out' of fashion. While we might snicker at
the terminally trendy folk who are always trying to ride the wave
of the latest fad, we are all affected by these trends. Green
and yellow appliances were a hot item in the 1970's, but just
scream OLD when you see them now. And let's not even talk about
the brown tuxedo I wore when I was married. (Excuse: It was the
1970's and I was young. At least it didn't have a Nehru collar
and bell bottoms.) While every manufacturer of a product hopes
that their line of stuff will become the newest hot item, the
world is full of cynical hypesters trying to convince us that
they have the next 'big thing.' Most times they are pushing
fashionable junk of course, but you never know. The guy who came
up with the pet rock made a ton of money and was smart enough to
get out when the trend peaked.
Goldfish swallowing, aluminum scooters, Beanie Babies, pogs,
Pokemon, body piercings, teddy bears, Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles, Dance Marathons, Rubik's Cube, Tie Dye T-shirts,
Coonskin Caps, Troll Dolls, Mood Rings, Hula Hoops, Cabbage Patch
Dolls, Streaking, Disco, 'Tickle Me Elmo' Dolls - Some of these
are still around, of course, but all started as fads.
Fads come in different flavors, from fashion to technology.
I suppose we don't even have to go into fads in clothing - there
is a whole industry there dependent on the fact that this years'
hot fashions will be next year's dust rags. And fads have a
tendency to mutate in odd and unexpected ways, even if they are
technological dead ends. Remember the CB-Radio fad of the
1970's? That evaporated like dew in the desert as soon as cell
phones became available. But it did prime people to the thought
that being in touch with everyone all of the time might be
useful. In the same way, 8-track tapes, for all their technical
faults, paved the way for in-car stereo systems with
far-more-practical CD's.
One thing that never goes out of fashion is the need to say
Thank you to our SUNFUN friends and contributors. Greetings and
thanks this week to: Josie Tong, Fumiko David, Caterina Sukup,
Fumiko Umino, Keiko Amakawa, Chuck & Peggy Beckman, Diana Lee,
Jorge Lenta, Tom Mereen, Paul Roser, Bruce Gonzo, Howard Lesniak,
Joshua Brink, Sharon Nuernberg, Jan Michalski, Tim McChain and,
especially, our friend Jerry Taff. Some things are never out of
fashion, of course, but you never know just how things will turn
out. Just like us, a fad gains respectability the longer it is
around, no matter how silly it may have seemed when it started.
And if a trendy fad hangs around long enough, it may even become
a tradition.
Have A Fashionable Week,
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"History repeats itself, the first time as tragedy, the
second time as farce."
- Karl Marx
[ As good an explanation as I've ever heard
for the current popularity of those retro
1970's fashions. ]
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THE MOTHER OF ALL FADS...
----------------------
So many people were surprised by the recent collapse of
large numbers of all those speculative dot.com stocks. Funny how
the folks busy inventing the latest hot industry always think
that the old rules no longer apply and that there is some good
reason for their idea to be ridiculously overvalued. What they
really needed was to have paid closer attention in history class;
these things always come crashing back to earth when reality sets
in. Sounds more and more like Pets.Com, doesn't it? The big
players in any new industry figure out how to make money and
always seem to survive. It's the late-blooming speculators
looking to make a quick million that get stuck when the bubble
bursts. Not like this is a new trend, or anything - it happened
just the same way in the 1600's in the first huge fad in the
modern sense. Only then, it was flowers.
In 1593, a wandering botanist named Carolus Clusis brought
some plants from Constantinople to his home at the University of
Leiden in Holland. He had no interest in flowers as such; he was
looking for medicinal plants at the time. While the bulbs of the
new species proved edible, even vaguely onion-like, they didn't
seem to have any effect on disease. Neighbors of the university
who noticed the exotic new flowers with their distinctive, cup-
like blooms growing in Carolus' garden tried to buy some, but
Carolus refused to sell. But these were flowers that the folks
just HAD to have, so some spade-wielding neighbors helped
themselves to a few bulbs late one night.
The exotic new flowers were the common tulip, which happens
to do quite well in the Dutch climate and easily produces a wide
variety of colors, something few of the flowers known in
sixteenth-century Holland were capable of doing. It quickly
became trendy for wealthy Hollanders to have some tulips in their
gardens. With the poor communications and advertising of the
day, this went on for about 70 years with tulip prices increasing
steadily. And as the price went up, things became more and more
foolish, with people going ever deeper into hock to buy tulip
bulbs that were actually too expensive to plant and grow. But
with prices rising so steadily, it seemed like they couldn't
lose, no matter what foolishly inflated price they paid. It was
the height of Tulipomania. Flowers that are considered rather
ordinary now were bid up to incredible levels - not bad for what
was only a Persian wildflower.
The price one merchant paid for one tulip transaction at the
height of the flower speculation gives some idea just how stupid
things got: 2 loads of wheat, 4 loads of rye, 4 oxen, 8 swine,
12 sheep, 126 gallons of wine, 60 kegs of beer, 2 tons of butter,
1,000 pounds of cheese, a suit of clothes, a complete bed and a
silver drinking cup. For this boatload of stuff the merchant got
exactly one Viceroy tulip bulb, today worth a whopping 40 cents,
retail. Even an inferior Semper Augustus tulip bulb was worth as
much as 23 tons of cheese at the time. Weirder still, it became
possible to trade bits of paper claiming that you owned a
particular kind of tulip bulb, which you could trade at ever
higher prices without even producing the actual bulb.
But as with all flowers, the bloom eventually came off of
the tulip bubble with a minor government action in April of 1637
that decreed tulip transactions would be conducted in the same
businesslike way as other sales. Somehow, everyone came out of
the tulip trace at once and prices dropped ruining thousands of
flower speculators. But the ten million bulbs on the market at
the time didn't go completely to waste - many of the newly poor
speculators ate their expensive flower bulbs over the next winter
to keep from starving.
[ You have to know that, 400 years later,
that would have been WWW.TULIP.COM. ]
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FROM BAD TO EVEN WORSE?
----------------------
It seemed so right a place for it that it just couldn't fail
- a store that featured items in bad taste right in the heart of
one of Los Angeles' oddest and trendiest areas.
The store "You've Got Bad Taste" opened three years ago in
the bohemian Silverlake area featuring strictly off-key products.
Bad taste? How about breast-shaped sponges for $6, paintings by
serial killer John Wayne Gacy ($400 and up), framed Patty Hearst
"Wanted By the FBI" posters for $35, Mr. T air fresheners for $3
or Dukes of Hazzard plastic digital watches for five bucks. The
owners considered the store an experiment in what amused or
enraged Angelinos.
One bright spot though - the store failed to attract enough
customers to stay in business.
"I guess people in L.A. do have bad taste because we ended
up closing the store," said store co-owner Exene Cervenka
bitterly.
[ NEWS FLASH - L.A. has the good taste to
reject bad taste! More good news later... ]
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LEAPIN' LIZARDS, SANDY!
----------------------
Though it is America's home to the latest fashion trends,
L.A. can be a cold and lonely place to be homeless. Even if you
are six feet (2 meters) long with green scales and a tail.
A few years back, the trendiest pets were those cute little
South American iguanas. Easy to care for and not very demanding,
the little lizards seemed perfect pets for modern lifestyles.
Then reality caught up. The little beasties ARE very cute
when small, but grow to the size of small alligators when mature.
The adult lizards are testy, aggressive and un-trainable pests
that whip their owners with their heavy tails, leap through
screens and take over family swimming pools. Because of their
exotic origins and poorly understood habits, they also rack up
expensive vet and food bills. To the point that people have been
abandoning the formerly-trendy pets and thousands of the ill-
tempered mini-Godzillas are slithering around the back streets of
Los Angeles. Even animal rescue groups don't want to deal with
these lizards on the loose.
And, it's not just L.A. that's having the problem. The
Japanese Parliament had to put aside dealing with money and
political woes recently to tackle the issue of rampant reptiles
running wild on the streets of Tokyo. Runaway turtles, iguanas,
snakes and even an occasional alligator have been spotted on
Japanese streets as the reptile pet fad has become popular. It
is hard - and often against apartment rules - to keep cats and
dogs in Japan's crowded cities, accounting for the popularity of
more exotic pets. And the current animal protection laws aren't
much help, according to the Prime Minister's office. Just as in
L.A., the law protecting animals makes it a crime to throw away
pets, but this does not seem to apply to reptiles.
"It's basically for mammals and birds," one official
admitted. (Reuters)
[ The message is clear, if a little hypocritical: abuse
something with fur or feathers and the PETA crowd will
be all over you. But slithery green things need not
apply. ]
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THE HILLS ARE ALIVE?
-------------------
You just never know which fads are going to take off and
which are going to flop. Even the stupidest-sounding idea
sometimes becomes a big hit, whether it makes any sense or not.
Further proof - if any was needed - that we humans are an
illogical and terminally trendy species.
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you: 'Sound of Music' karaoke.
While it sounds like something invented by the Monty Python troop
or a satirical newspaper like "The Onion," it was real enough and
made big bucks for a time at the Prince Charles Cinema in London.
Or would that be piles of pounds sterling?
Sing along with the Sound of Music? Think of it as a kitsch
version of the 'Rocky Horror Picture Show.' Audiences showed up
at the special performances dressed in lederhosen and nun's
outfits, and the theater helpfully flashed subtitles on the
screen to help fans sing along with Julie Andrews and the gang in
the 1960's hit musical.
"Audience reaction is absolutely wonderful. It is a
complete sellout," said a cinema spokesman at the time.
"Communal singing is a hugely uplifting thing. It is more fun
than singing in church." (Reuters)
[ Weird, but tolerable. After all, they
could all have been singing along to
"Nightmare on Elm Street." ]
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FINE WITH ME...
------------
Doug and Ellen Henry of Lawrenceville, Georgia thought
they'd found a real bargain in the pair of pink plastic flamingos
he picked up at an antique market for $15. And maybe they did,
but their neighbors in the Towne Park subdivision apparently
didn't agree. Claiming that the Henrys violated homeowners'
association rules forbidding unapproved lawn decorations, they
fined the couple $25 a day. Of course, it might have been nice
if the association had notified the couple before the fines
topped $3,400. When finally made aware of the outstanding
flamingo fine, the angered couple saw pink.
"That's a lot of money for two little flamingos," said Ellen
Henry.
The Henrys only learned of the fine while trying to sell
their home. The homeowners association claims it sent the couple
two certified letters explaining the fine which were returned as
"undeliverable."
Long viewed by some as the very height of 1950's tacky, the
pink plastic birds have a surprising artistic pedigree. A
company called Union Products of Leominster, Massachusetts
originated their line of "Plastics for the Lawn" in 1946,
culminating in the famous flamingo about a decade later.
Sculpted by serious artist and designer Don Featherstone, the
tacky pink fashion statements are still being made. The company
has even introduced a line of blue flamingos to get around rules
aimed at the pink birds. Though there are many cheap knock-
off's, authentic, original pink flamingos have yellow beaks with
black tips and are sold only in pairs. And they still have Don
Featherstone's signature under their tails.
Making it perhaps the only authentic, signed artwork in many
subdivisions. (AP)
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HIGH FASHION...
------------
Perhaps because of its cohesive society, love of technology
and comparatively well-to-do income, Japan is the home of many
fads trends from trendy fashions to the latest high-tech gadgets.
They even have techno-toilets that automatically monitor the
user's blood pressure and temperature.
But not all of these trends are so healthy. Among the
newest dangers to public safety: platform shoes. Traffic police
in Japan want to give that recent fad the boot after numerous
auto accidents caused by young women unable to untangle their
fashionably-clad feet fast enough to hit the brakes.
The current footwear fad in Japan has taken 1970's platform
shoes to new heights, with many women wearing nosebleed-level
platforms of up to 12 inches (30 cm). Authorities there have
already issued rules in some areas instructing drivers not to
wear shoes "which would prevent safe driving." Initial tests
have backed up the rules, showing that drivers wearing platform
shoes take a crucial fraction of a second longer to apply the
brakes than drivers wearing normal shoes.
And health officials had already warned of the danger of
back and ankle injuries from walking around in the towering
footwear. (Reuters)
[ Not to mention the danger of falling off of
your shoes. ]
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AND NOW, THE DUMBEST CURRENT FAD
--------------------------------
Laundromat owners in Britain were puzzled by a sudden
increase in repair bills to their heavy-duty tumble dryers. One
launderette manager in Wales knew something odd was afoot when he
had to replace a number of nylon drive gears all at once.
"We hadn't seen one go in years and then suddenly we had a
spate of eight in two weeks," said owner Stuart Fecci.
Security cameras finally found the problem was schoolboys
daring each other to take rides in the dryers, apparently finding
the 20 pence (30 cent) fee cheaper than local amusement parks.
No immediate word on what started the potentially dangerous fad.
(Reuters)
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OLD FADS DIE HARD...
-----------------
Two men, sentenced to die in the electric chair on the same
day, were led down to the execution room in which they would meet
their maker.
The warden turned to the first man and solemnly asked, "Son,
do you have a last request?"
"Yes sir, I do," the man replied. "I love dance music.
Could you please play the Macarena for me one last time?"
"Certainly," replied the warden.
He turned to the other man and asked, "What about you, son?
What is your final request?"
"If you are going to play that song for him," said the
condemned man, "Please let me go first."
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© 2001 by Bill Becwar. All Rights Reserved.
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