Hello again, Fire Buffs...
One of the few positive things to come out of the 9-11
attack was a tremendous boost in the respect given to fire
fighters and police officers. This was a new feeling for some
people, but not for us here at SUNFUN. Only once did we ever
have to call for professional fire help, and that just for a
mysterious burning smell that we couldn't trace (which turned out
to be a bad power supply on an electric piano keyboard). The
thing that impressed us about our suburban department here is
that the firefighters all wiped their feet as they came in in
their turnout gear and boots. Though we've rarely had to avail
ourselves of their professional services, it's comforting knowing
that the fire folks are out there, and know what to do.
And even more important than just knowing, they do it!
Thanks this week to all of our SUNFUN regulars - and to the
folks at the fire station who are there to bail us out whenever
we do something foolish. Special SUNFUN greetings to: John
(Pete) Peterson, Jerry Taff, Nnamdi Elleh, Laura Hedien, Jan
Michalski, Carol Becwar, Wallace Adams, Fumiko David, Tim
McChain, R.J. Tully, Bob Martens, Bruce Gonzo, Charles Beckman,
Joshua Brink and Paul Roser. So, pull on your boots and turnouts
and slide down the pole as SUNFUN responds to investigate funny
fire departments.
Have A Great Week,
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IMPORTANT ADDRESS NOTE...
----------------------
As promised a while back, plans are to change over the
SUNFUN sends to a new Email address real soon now. That goes for
jokes and other material you submit to SUNFUN as well. The new
address for SUNFUN as of (fingers crossed) 1/1/2002 will be:
sunfun[spamless]@wi.rr.com
( Remove the [spamless] part -
it's just there to block address
grabbers )
The current billbb@compuserve.com will continue to work for
a little while longer, but it will probably be gone about a month
after everyone gets going on the new server. The new Sunday
Funnies address is open now, so you can start sending submissions
to that address. Personal Email to me will change at the same
time, and should be sent to:
billbb[spamless]@wi.rr.com
( Remove the [spamless] part -
it's just there to block address
grabbers )
I've tried to make these as simple and logical as possible
so we don't lose anyone. As always, if you don't get SUNFUN by
sometime on Monday, just send along an Email to the SUNFUN home
address and we'll figure out why and get it to you. And you can
also check the website for the current issue.
- billbb
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
"911, WHAT IS YOUR EMERGENCY?"
---------------------------
"What's the number for 911?"
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
MEMO FROM THE CHIEF...
-------------------
To: All Riding Members
From: Office of the Chief
Subject: Proper Narrative Descriptions
It has come to our attention from several emergency rooms
that many EMS reports have taken a decidedly creative direction
lately. Effective immediately, all members are to refrain from
using slang and abbreviations to describe patients in official
reports, such as the following.
1) Cardiac patients should not be referred to with MUH (messed
up heart), PBS (pretty bad shape), PCL (pre-code looking) or
HIBGIA (had it before, got it again).
2) Stroke patients are NOT "Charlie Carrots." Nor are rescuers
to use CCFCCP (Coo Coo for Cocoa Puffs) to describe their
mental state.
3) Trauma patients are not CATS (cut all to sh*t), FDGB (fall
down, go boom), TBC (total body crunch) or "hamburger
helper." Similarly, descriptions of a car crash do not have
to include phrases like "negative vehicle to vehicle
interface" or "terminal deceleration syndrome."
4) HAZMAT teams are highly trained professionals, not "glow
worms."
5) Persons with altered mental states as a result of drug use
are not considered "pharmaceutically gifted."
6) Gunshot wounds to the head are not "trans-occipital
implants."
7) The homeless are not "urban outdoorsmen", nor is inserting
an airway to be referred to as a "PVC Challenge".
8) And finally, do not refer to recently deceased persons as
being "paws up," ART (assuming room temperature), CC (Cancel
Christmas), CTD (circling the drain), or NLPR (no longer
playing records).
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
911, WHAT IS YOUR EMERGENCY?
---------------------------
"My phone doesn't work."
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
ANOTHER WAY TO PUT IT?
---------------------
The employees of a local restaurant attended a fire-safety
seminar, where a fire official demonstrated the proper way to
operate a fire extinguisher.
"Pull the pin like a hand grenade," he explained, "then
depress the trigger to release the chemicals to put out the
fire."
Later, one employee was selected to extinguish a controlled
fire in the parking lot. In her nervousness, she forgot to pull
the pin on the handle.
"Like a hand grenade, remember?" the instructor hinted.
In a burst of confidence, she pulled the pin - and hurled
the extinguisher into the blaze.
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
911, WHAT IS YOUR EMERGENCY?
---------------------------
"Can you come over and help me put on tire chains?"
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
UNLIKELIEST HERO...
----------------
Fire fighters responding to a trailer fire in Eugene, Oregon
found that the fire had already been put out by a hero you would
least expect - the family's toilet.
Investigators believe an unattended candle in the trailer's
bathroom started the blaze, which spread quickly. Heat from the
fire caused the porcelain toilet to shatter, drowning the flames.
(AP)
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
911, WHAT IS YOUR EMERGENCY?
---------------------------
"My toilet is plugged. Can you send someone to fix
it?"
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
WHEN THE BOSS IS WATCHING...
-------------------------
You've heard of the fire triangle - that oxygen, heat and
fuel are all required to keep a fire burning? But most
firefighters believe more in the fire square: Fuel, oxygen, heat
source, and the chief. Take any one away and the fire goes out.
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
WHO YA GONNA CALL?
-----------------
EMTs in Delafield, Wisconsin were watching a fire training
film as part of their certification training. As it happened,
this film was aimed at the general public, so the first step in
every emergency medical procedure included the instruction, "Call
9-1-1."
After a while, one of the tech trainees looked over and
asked, "I thought we were 9-1-1... Who do we call?"
- Shawn Mullen
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
TWO DOWN, ONE OUT...
-----------------
Christina Mack, 35, was arrested for attempted murder in
Peoria, Illinois, a while back. The arrest was based on a
neighbor's statement that Mack said she planned to cover a floor
with oil or grease so that her boyfriend, who lost his right leg
in 1992, would fall down the stairs to his death. The
unfortunate fellow fell, all right, and smacked his head, but
declined medical assistance.
The scheming Ms. Mack, however, also fell, knocking herself
out cold. Firefighters revived her so the police could take her
away.
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
YOU KNOW YOU'RE A FIREFIGHTER IF...
--------------------------------
- You can tell what type of fire it is by the smell of smoke -
10 miles away.
- You have ever smoked and there wasn't a cigarette in sight.
- You lay out your clothes from that day so if there is a call
at night you can find them quickly.
- You have ever spent 10 minutes trying to force open a door
only to have someone come along and open it by turning the
handle.
- You sometimes take 10 or more showers in 1 day.
- You have had a heated debate over the color of fire trucks.
- You have ever been airborne without an aircraft and
propelled only by water.
- You always wear red suspenders.
- You have ever slept in a hosebed.
- You have ever stomped out a fire with your boots because you
couldn't wait for water.
- Your kids are afraid to get into water fights with you.
- "Climbing the corporate ladder" has nothing to do with
career advancement.
- Your work gear makes you sound like Darth Vader.
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
911, WHAT IS YOUR EMERGENCY?
---------------------------
"Yeah, uh, I'm on a business trip and I know you guys are up
early anyway, so... I was wondering if you could give me a
wake up call. I'm at the Rockford Hotel in Room 312."
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
THE WORLD'S MOST EMBARRASSING FIRE CALLS...
----------------------------------------
- BACK SEAT DRIVER
----------------
Ambulance drivers taking 59-year-old heart patient
Allen Lowden from a hospital in Glasgow, Scotland to one in
Dumfries got lost when the driver turned the wrong
direction. When he realized the driver had taken a wrong
turn, patient Lowden, though just out of open heart surgery,
helped them navigate from his stretcher in the back. The
patient finally got them back on track after the wrong turn
that added an extra 140 miles (225 KM) to the trip.
(Reuters)
- LEAVES 'EM BREATHLESS...
---------------------
Dispatcher: "911. Fire or Emergency?"
Woman: "Uh, I got a girl here who's having trouble
breathing."
Dispatcher: "How old is she?"
Woman: "About twenty-one, twenty-two, something like
that."
Dispatcher: "Do you know if she's an asthmatic?"
Woman: "Not that I know of."
Dispatcher: "Have someone check her purse for an
inhaler."
Woman: "Sure." (Calls to someone to check purse.)
"She's a member of the club here, and it's never
happened before."
Dispatcher: "What was she doing right before the attack?"
Woman: "Uh, she was dancing."
Dispatcher: "Has her breathing stabilized any?"
Woman: "No, she's still struggling and wheezing."
Dispatcher: "Try loosening her clothes to make her more
comfortable."
Woman: "I don't think that would help."
Dispatcher: "Why not?"
Woman: "Like I said, she's a dancer."
Dispatcher: "Yes... "
Woman: "She works over here at the Pleasure Chest - she's
a topless dancer, you know?"
Dispatcher: "Oh..."
- NO EXCEPTIONS...
-------------
Firehouse cooking was seriously disrupted in Columbia,
Tennessee when the fire marshal issued an order prohibiting
station personnel from frying in their station kitchens. It
seems the stoves there do not conform to the state fire
codes, lacking the fire suppression system required for all
"commercial type" stovetops. Pretty embarrassing that the
firehall's own equipment was rated as a fire hazard.
Later, the order was amended to allow the firefolks to
make hamburgers and other fried foods, but only if a fire
fighter equipped with an extinguisher stands along side the
cook.
"Of course that's kind of insulting to any chef's ego,"
said Fire Marshal Jim Swindle, "but you might say it's an
incentive to get the sprinklers installed within 60 days."
(Reuters)
- EXPERT ASSISTANCE...
-----------------
London (England) paramedics arrived on the scene on the
platform of the Buckhurst Hill station in Essex on the
report that a human fetus had been found. Fearing that a
woman had had a miscarriage, they rushed the newborn to the
hospital where doctors discovered that it was an alien egg
toy, the latest toy craze to hit the London area. The toy
contains what looks like an tiny unborn child curled in a
fetal position and suspended in a blob of goo inside of a
plastic bag. (Reuters)
- CLOSE TO HOME
-------------
Members of the Quaker Farms Fire Company in Oxford,
Connecticut never even got their new truck to its first fire
call. While taking the showroom-fresh $300,000 engine out
for a test run, the pumper itself caught fire. The truck
company had to call back to quarters for aid in
extinguishing the rapidly-spreading engine fire. The truck
was eventually towed back to the builder, who has promised
to replace it with a slightly more fireproof new one. (AP)
- A CONTROLLING INTEREST...
----------------------
A fire chief in England was fuming after his crew
tricked him into using a fake 'high tech' clicker to turn
red traffic lights green on 999 (the British 911) runs. Sub
officer John Beamson, 43, of the Surrey, England Fire
Service received a letter at his station with the remote
control to test. The letter, on official Fire Brigade
letterhead, said if he pointed the "state of the art" device
at red traffic lights they would change to green to make
getting to the fire scene faster. For a bit of cover, the
letter said that the control had to be held at a precise
angle and that certain older traffic lights wouldn't respond
to the high-tech control and should be reported.
For more than a month, the chief would lean out the
window on every truck run, rain or shine, happily clicking
away and smiling in satisfaction each time the light turned
green - as they always did, eventually.
"The lads were all encouraging him, but were splitting
their sides," one of the fire fighters admitted. "The
equipment was a bit of junk from one of the lad's homes -
but it has been put through an exhaustive road test by the
boss."
The chief eventually found out about the scam after
bragging to another fire captain how useful his new toy was.
- YOU'RE FIRED!
------------
In March of 1998, the Hamlin Volunteer Fire Department
in West Virginia responded to a house fire. Arriving on the
scene and finding the house fully involved, the crew quickly
pulled hoses and hooked up to a nearby hydrant. But shortly
after they turned their attention to the blaze, their pumper
somehow slipped into gear and rolled into the still-burning
house before anyone could stop it. Fortunately, the hot
fire truck continued to run even while inside the fire, so
the Hamlin fire folk were eventually able to put out the
fire using the unusual "inside out" pumping technique. No
one was injured, but the home was destroyed and the fire
truck heavily damaged. (AP)
- FULLY INVOLVED
--------------
"We got dispatched by a local security company for a
medical alarm. Upon arrival we got no answer at the door
and found it locked. After numerous attempts to see if
anyone was home we obtained permission to forcibly enter
(noises could be heard inside). Our fire chief arrived and
the door was removed from it's hinges and in we all went.
"We quickly located the [source] of the noise in one of
the upstairs bedrooms. A couple was practicing
reproduction, to put it nicely. After lots of red faces we
scurried back out of the room and called our dispatcher.
The dispatcher called the security company and discovered
they had given us the wrong address and the call was a false
alarm.
"We replaced the door and the couple signed off on our
run report (We figured this one better have good
[documentation])."
- PeteEMT (from the Web)
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
© 2001 by Bill Becwar. All Rights Reserved.
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