Hello, Fellow Motorists...
Almost all of us drive. Some of us even enjoy it. At
least, those of us who don't have to fight a long daily commute
into and out of town every day. If you believe the statistics,
we are driving more and enjoying it less, as more people move out
and live further from cities. Driving has ceased being
entertainment and now is just getting from point A to point B.
The traditional Sunday drive seems to be just a quaint memory of
a bygone age. Even though gasoline - at least in the U.S. - has
never been much cheaper when adjusted for inflation, we no longer
drive for pleasure or escape.
But whether we really enjoy driving or not doesn't matter
much to those of us here in the States. We will be driving
whether we enjoy it or not, if only to get from work to home.
Public transportation here is expensive, inconvenient, or even
unavailable to most commuters. So we pile into our cars and head
out to join the other loonies and make the roads more crowded
every day. No wonder a few of the drivers seem to have lost
contact with reality out there some days.
Thanks this week to the folks that keep us in contact with
reality, no matter where we roam, including: Helen Yee & Wayne
Pokora, Laura Hong Li, Sylvia Libin He, Miki Taniguchi, Jerry
Taff, Joshua & Anna Brink, Nnamdi Elleh, Rosana Leung, Josie
Tong, Fumiko Umino, Patricia Vanderveen, Meredith & Yasmin
Leischer, Brian Siegl, Jan & Diane Michalski, Peter J. Adler,
Carol J. Becwar, Beth & Jim Butler and Timothy T. McChain. That
reminds me! I have to finish this thing and turn in - we're
supposed to drive to Chicago tomorrow morning...
Have A Great Week & Happy Motoring!
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SOME PEOPLE NEVER LEARN...
-----------------------
You have to hand it to some people - no matter how many ways
they are told something, they just can't accept it. That
happened to a group of motorists recently in Toronto, Canada.
These particular drivers were all in various parking lots
around the Toronto (Canada) courthouse over a ten-day period last
Spring. And, technically, they were drivers in name only, having
just lost their licenses after being convicted on various driving
charges.
Police were somewhat surprised at how few of the former
motorists were discouraged from getting in their cars and
attempting to drive away after their convictions. All eight were
promptly re-arrested and charged again. And you'll be seeing at
least six of them on the Toronto Transit streetcars - police
impounded their vehicles for at least 45 days. (Reuters)
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TALK ABOUT WRONG TURNS...
----------------------
It's pretty well known that old people sometimes become
confused when behind the wheel. Sometimes they even miss their
turn or end up miles from where they intended. Taking that to
extremes was an 87-year-old man in Gothenburg, Sweden last
spring.
He somehow took a wrong turn on the motorway and ended up in
unfamiliar territory. Very unfamiliar. Another country.
Police 155 miles (250 km) from Gothenburg in Oslo, Norway
finally noticed the man driving very strangely and stopped him to
investigate. They got him turned back toward home, where Swedish
police immediately stopped him after watching the disoriented
driver operating recklessly on the highway.
The officers finally just gave the confused man a lift back
to his home in the Gothenburg suburb of Orgryte and confiscated
his driving license.
"I only wanted to go out and buy some flowers," the man told
the newspaper 'Expressen.' (Reuters)
[ Sure is lucky that his wife didn't send him
out for Danish... ]
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FLYING BY THE SEAT OF YOUR PANTS...
-------------------------------
For whatever reason, Nissan has come up with a new way to
prove that at least one part of their cars will last: a jeans
covered mechanical backside to test the durability of the seats
on its new Primera model.
The "Nissan Bottom," which is based on the sitting portion
of an average 154-pound (70 kg.) person, slides in, rubs back and
forth three times, then slides back out. Sounds easy, but it
takes a durable derriere to repeat the test more than three times
a minute for 72 hours without a break. That's 15,000 times
sliding in and out of the car.
"This is equivalent to 32 years of travelling to and from
work - almost an entire working life for many drivers," Nissan
Europe said proudly. (Reuters)
[ You know I included this story just to ask,
"Buns of steel?," Right? ]
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"You never really learn to swear until you learn to
drive."
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OK, TRY PLAN B...
--------------
A simple plan: rob the bank, then run outside and change
clothes so you won't be recognized. As those things go, it isn't
such a bad plan.
Except for the changing clothes part. Police allege that
Lucas Winters, a 17-year-old from Klamath Falls, Oregon, came up
with this fool proof (or, "proof fool," if you prefer) plan for a
bank robbery last August. Police were called to the U.S. Bank
branch in the small town of Hermiston, where a man in a red shirt
and white hat had passed a teller a note demanding money. Before
the shocked clerk could react, the man grabbed a pile of cash and
fled.
Police searched the area for the robber for about 40 minutes
before noticing a pounding from inside the trunk of one car in a
nearby parking lot and a male voice pleading for help. Police
and fire rescuers had to remove the cars back seat before they
could free the entrapped teenager. His description matched the
bank robber and the teen in the trunk was arrested on charges of
second-degree robbery.
Authorities believe that Winters jumped into the trunk of
his getaway car after the robbery in order to change clothes, but
before determining whether he could open the trunk from the
inside. He couldn't. Even worse, the temperature that day was
over 100 degrees, so the temperature in the trunk was extremely
uncomfortable, leaving the baked bandito much the worse for wear.
"[When he called for help] He was probably hoping that it
was someone other than a police officer," police spokesman Lt.
Jerry Roberts said. (AP)
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HOME ON THE ROAD...
----------------
Despite the economic problems in Asia, business has been
good for Thailand's millionaire ex-bus driver, Samrauy Chuenchum.
The 49-year-old business tycoon made a fortune running his fleets
of tour buses, and he spent most of his time on the road before
his wife insisted that he spend more time at home. But he found
it hard to leave his former life behind.
So, Samrauy spent four million baht ($98,000) and 10 months
building his dream house about 30 km (20 miles) north of Bangkok.
Maybe it's no surprise that the cozy, two-bedroom house is
shaped just like a large double-decker bus, complete with an
office that features bus-style windows and even a computer-
controlled driving simulator. And, of course, a steering wheel.
You might wonder just what Mrs. Chuenchum thinks of all of
this, except that the couple met while she was working as a bus
hostess and tour guide. (Reuters)
[ Bus-ness as usual? ]
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MAKE THAT A DOUBLE...
------------------
Police in Reykjavik, Iceland stopped a motorist who was
weaving down the highway last June. They pulled over the driver
and hauled him down to the police station for questioning. After
determining that he was very drunk, and giving him a ticket, they
allowed him to go home in a taxi to sleep it off.
Back on patrol an hour and a half later, the same policemen
pulled over another car that was also having trouble staying in
the lanes on a straight road. Who should it be but the same 30-
year-old man in a different car. After another round of tickets
and questioning, they sent him home in another taxi. This time
making sure that he stayed home. (Reuters)
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HEY, SVEN! HE'S AT IT AGAIN!
----------------------------
Sometimes, I run across separate news stories that really
seem like they are related. I think that might be the case here,
with the story of a woman in the northern Icelandic village of
Akureyri. She was driving along peacefully when, without
warning, a car sped out of a parking lot and smashed into the
side of her auto.
Then, the very next day, she was driving a rental car when
she was hit again. This time the driver ran through a stop
signal to plow into her. Even though traffic in northern Iceland
is so sparse that you can drive for hours without seeing another
car, it was the same driver as the day before. He claimed that
his vision was impaired by the low sunlight. (Reuters)
[ But I certainly wonder what the repeat
drunk driving offender from the story above
was doing at the time, don't you? ]
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TAKES ONE TO KNOW ONE...
---------------------
Meanwhile, in Minneapolis, Minnesota, a guy named Curtiss
Clarin was charged with failing to take a breathalyzer test after
the police stopped him on suspicion of drunken driving. Not much
chance that he didn't understand what the test was about; Clarin
has been employed by the Minneapolis Police Department for the
last 15 years to testify in jury trials about how breathalyzers
work. (TRUE)
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PARK HERE...
---------
The state of Washington is known for its many beautiful
islands - and also for the ferries that allow people to get from
one island to another. Travelling by ferry boat quickly becomes
a normal part of the daily routine for the locals.
Which makes what happened on the state-operated ferry Chelan
earlier this year all the more strange. When the ferry docked in
Bremerton, deckhands noticed a brand new Mazda still sitting on
board after all of the other cars had been driven off. Finding
no one around, the ferry operators made the usual calls, assuming
that someone might have fallen - or jumped - overboard on their
last trip.
They were just towing the car off the ship when the driver
showed up. The woman from Renton, Washington and her daughter
had gone for a long walk, apparently never realizing that she
couldn't just leave the car parked on the ferry. (AP)
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WHAT GOES AROUND...
----------------
One of the basic rules of law in all civilized countries is
that the law applies equally to everyone. But even the most
civilized might be surprised at the speeding tickets handed out
in Wales recently.
Three drivers in North Wales had their licenses suspended
for 28 days after they were caught riding their motorbikes at
over 100 mph (160 km/h). The unusual part is that the three
speedy cyclists were officers on police motorcycles. Worse yet,
this happened the same week Britain's police launched a
nationwide motorcycle safety campaign. (Reuters)
[ Obviously someone didn't read the memo... ]
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GETTING THE ROYAL TREATMENT...
---------------------------
Early this year, 17-year-old Prince William, the future king
of England, received his first car - a Volkswagen Golf. A
Buckingham Palace spokesman refused to give the exact make or
color, for security reasons.
But there is one person who might know. For the details, we
could probably ask Mr. Simon Thompson, a computer software
salesman whose BMW quit running in west London's fashionable
Sloane Square. Thompson and a friend were trying to push the car
out of the road when another car pulled up and two young
gentlemen jumped out to help push -- Prince William and his
younger brother Prince Harry, who happened to be passing.
"They acted as though it was no big deal," Thompson told the
Evening Standard newspaper. "It is amazing when there are two
princes pushing your car down the road." (Reuters)
[ And if their Grandmum was around, her royal
highness might have taken a try at getting
the car going again... You'll remember that
the Queen trained as a mechanic during WWII
when she was just a princess. ]
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FAST TALKING
------------
A state patrol officer was sitting on the side of the
highway waiting to catch speeders one day, when he saw a car
puttering along at 22 MPH (13 km/h). Thinking that a car going
only half the speed limit might be just as dangerous on the
highway as a speeder, he turned on his lights and pulled the
driver over.
In the car are five old ladies - two in the front seat and
three in the back - wide eyed and white as ghosts. The elderly
driver, obviously confused, said to him, "Officer, I don't
understand, I was doing exactly the speed limit! What might be
the problem?"
"Ma'am," the officer replies, "You weren't speeding, but you
should know that driving that much slower than the speed limit
can also be a danger to other drivers."
"Slower than the speed limit? No sir, I was doing the speed
limit exactly... Twenty-Two miles an hour!" the old woman said
proudly. The State Police officer, trying to contain a chuckle
explained to her that "22" sign was the highway number, not the
speed limit.
A bit embarrassed, the woman smiled and thanked the officer
for pointing out her mistake. "But before I let you go, Ma'am, I
have to ask... Is everyone in this car OK? These ladies in the
back seem awfully shaken and they hardly even moved the whole
time I've been standing here." the officer asked.
"Oh, they'll be alright in a little while, officer," the
elderly driver smiled. "We just got off of Route 119."
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© 1999 by Bill Becwar. All Rights Reserved.
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