Welcome back, Film Fans!
How many of you stay to watch the credits at the end of a
movie? Seems that they are getting longer all the time, doesn't
it? The earliest films hardly had any credits at all, often
listing only the name of the production company without even
mentioning the actors. In Hollywood's factory days, movie
credits were sparse by today's standards, with credits only for
producer, director, writer, cinematographer and major stars. It
would no more occur to the movie studio execs of the time to
credit the other crew than it would occur to the heads of a car
company to include the name of the guy on the assembly line who
installed your car's steering wheel.
With the rise of movie unions in the 1950's and 60's, that
all changed. These days, film credits have exploded to the point
where the credits often run as long as many early movies. The
end credits for "Superman" (1978), rolled by for a mind-numbing
12 minutes, listing nearly everyone who had anything to do with
the movie for a total of 457 names. And that's not even the
record. The part-animated "Who Framed Roger Rabbit" (1989) ran
743 names past, though they did it in half the time by making you
read faster.
Most of the time, the audience gets up to rush for the
bathrooms as soon as the closing music starts. That's really too
bad, because the credits are occasionally better than the movie.
Movie makers sometimes put bits of the story into or after the
credits, I suppose to keep people watching. There are also jokes
and general silliness inspired by the idea that not as many
people will see them, so the movie makers can have some fun.
This is especially common in comedy movies, of course. For
example, the folks that made 'Airplane' salted the credits with
dozens of silly credits, including a final scene after the
copyright notice at the very end.
So sit back and grab that last bit of popcorn from the
bottom of the bag as SUNFUN Productions presents "The Sunday
Funnies":
"CREDITS WHERE CREDITS ARE DUE..."
Production Manager ..... Caterina Sukup
From A Story By ........ Carol Becwar
Thumbs Up .............. Roger Ebert
Security ............... Timothy McChain
Fashion Consultant ..... Sue P. Yan
Voiceovers ............. Jerry Taff
Set Design ............. Nnamdi Elleh
Still Photographer ..... Dick Ginkowski
Chemistry Advisor ...... Sylvia Libin He
Mr. Becwar Provided by . Bernie & Donna Becwar
Customer Services ...... Ellen Peterson
Copying Services ....... Etsuko Hori
Military Services ...... Lt. Col. Peter J. Adler, USA
Kraft Services ......... Laura Hong Li
Religious Services ..... Rev. Bill Bryant
Original Music ......... Mark Becwar
Art Director ........... Helen Yee
Dialect Coach .......... Nancy Wohlge
Hula Instructor ........ Naomi Ogawa
Offline Editor ......... Dale Frederickson
German Tutor ........... Alison M. Becwar
Dubbing Supervisor ..... Johan Verrept
Stunt Double for billbb ... Paul K. Roser
The producers of Sunday Funnies also wish to thank St.
Luke's Hospital, Milwaukee, WI for the use of their operating
room. This Sunday Funnies was produced in cooperation with Blue
Cross Blue Shield of Wisconsin, the Wauwatosa Film Commission and
the Wisconsin Cheese Board. No animals were harmed in the
production of Sunday Funnies, though a few were made nervous.
Have a Great Week!
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Note: All of the following are actual credits collected from
many, many sources. A few were obviously intended as jokes, of
course, but many seem to be serious -- which makes them all the
funnier.
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SOMEBODY'S BROTHER-IN-LAW?
-------------------------
- In the movie "Hollywood Hot Tubs" (1984) there's a credit
for "Breast Make-Up."
- "Second Second Assistant Director" in "Reform School Girls"
(1986)
- "Solomon and Sheba" (1959) has an "Orgy Sequence Advisor"
- "The Greek Tycoon" (1978) credits the "Assistant to the
Assistant Unit Publicist"
- The movie "The Linguini Incident" (1991) has the credit
"Special Effects Bras by Bart Trickel."
- The pretentious "Patti Rocks" (1989) has a "Spiritual
Advisor"
- A "Poet in Residence" is credited in "The Rainmaker" (1997)
- There's a credit for "Moose Choreography" in "Life of Brian"
(1979)
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In the movie, "The Bear" (1989), the credits include a
credit for the credits
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OOPS!
----
- Star Katharine Hepburn's name is misspelled in the opening
credits of "State of the Union" (1948)
- In the movie "The Flying Serpent" (1946), Director Jean
Yarbrough's name is spelled as 'Yarborough' in the credits.
- Star Chris Haywood was billed as 'Heywood' in the Autralian
movie, "The Bit Part" (1987).
- Christopher Walken's name is wrong in the credits for
"Annie Hall" (1977).
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"In Big Business" (1988) about two-thirds of the way
through the credits is the line: "Don't Go, It's Almost
Over"
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WRANGLERS
---------
Western movies first brought this word into the credits,
where the wrangler was the guy who took care of the horses.
Since then, movies have expanded on this, including a:
- "Bathtub Wrangler" in "Ghostbusters II" (1989)
- "On-set Pinocchio Wrangler" in "Pinocchio's Revenge" (1996)
- "Baby Wrangler" in "The Big Lebowski" (1998) AND "Raising
Arizona" (1987)
- "Trout Wrangler" in "A River Runs Through It"
- "Bra Wrangler" in the movie "Glitch!" (1988)
- "Rat Wrangler" in "Hollywood Hot Tubs" (1984)
- "Demon Wrangler" in "Hard To Die" (1990)
- "Spider Wrangler" in "James and the Giant Peach" (1996)
- "Tarantula Wrangler" in "Rough Magic" (1995)
- "Sparrow Wrangler" in "The Dark Half" (1991)
- "Skunk Wrangler" in "Patti Rocks" (1989)
- "Sperm Wrangler" in "Look Who's Talking, Too" (1990)
- "Roach Wrangler" in "Creepshow" (1959)
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
In the movie, "It's in the Bag!" (1945), a voice-over
by Fred Allen ridicules the whole idea of credits with
lines like: "You can find names like these in any phone
book."
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MYSTERIES
---------
Some credits just can't be explained...
- The movie, "The Bear" (FR 1989), lists four casting directors,
even though it has only three humans in the cast, one
non-speaking and the other two saying very little.
- In a recent column, Roger Ebert had a question from a reader
who had seen the new comedy movie "The Truman Show" in New
York City. For some odd reason, the end credits on the
movie were in French (i.e. 'Un Film de Peter Wier, Le Show
Truman'). Paramount Pictures claimed that this was
impossible, but further investigation shows that this has
happened before. At least some of the prints of the silly,
knockabout comedy "Night Patrol," set in LA, also have
credits in French, apparently as a joke. Also, in the movie
"Tron" (1982), a section of the end credits is in Chinese.
- In "Fargo" (1996), A symbol similar to the Artist Formerly
Known as Prince is in the credits as "victim in field", but
it is not the singer, it's one of the film crew.
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- In the French movie, "Les Visiteurs" (1993), after the final
credits, the screen shows a medieval knight who waves at the
audience and says "Hello to all you credits-lovers!"
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
THANKS?
------
- "Miranda" (GB 1947) has the credit "Tail by Dunlop." The
title character was a mermaid played by actress Glynis Johns
and the British tire company provided the fishy tail for her
costume.
- The Producers of "The Erotic Adventures of Robinson Crusoe"
(1975) included a credit thanking "the makers of the "Planet
of the Apes" for their inspiration without which this
picture would possibly have been better."
- The credits for "Penny Princess" (1952) include the credit
"The producers wish to thank the citizens of Lampidorra for
not speaking Lampidorran -- thus saving the expense of
English sub-titles."
- In "Bambi Meets Godzilla" (1969), there is a credit thanking
the City of Tokyo for their help in getting Godzilla to
appear in the movie.
- Maybe "Speed 2: Cruise Control" (1997) would have been
better if it hadn't been so concerned that "No oceans were
polluted during the filming of this movie."
- "Bullseye!" (1991) lists the ultimate in typecasting"
"Appearing without the permission of his mother, John
Cleese, as the man on the beach in Barbados who looks like
John Cleese."
- The movie "Backfire" (1995) says "No mimes were injured in
the making of this motion picture. Furs were not worn. All
catering was strictly vegetarian. Filmed entirely in a
non-smoking area. All females were referred to as "women".
White males were considered suspect and made to feel guilty.
Condoms were worn at all times."
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
(Thank You For Reading The Credits)
credit in "Sleepaway Camp II: Unhappy Campers" (1988)
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MOSTLY HARMLESS
---------------
- The movie "Lobster Man from Mars" (1989) states: "No
Lobsters Were Harmed During This Production, Only Eaten."
- "No animals or corpses were harmed in the filming of this
motion picture" said "Weekend at Bernie's II" (1993)
- The movie "Canadian Bacon" (1994) announced "No Canadians
were harmed in this production."
- "No space aliens were harmed in any way during the making of
this film" is a credit in "The Stupids" (1996)
- The surprisingly honest "Lots of small furry animals with
sad eyes were tortured making this movie" is a credit for
"Guns on the Clackamas: A Documentary" (1995)
- "Fierce Creatures" (1997) says "No animals were injured
during the making of this movie, only humans."
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
In "Better Off Dead" (1985), the last line of credits
reads "The movie's over, you can go home now."
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
WEIRD & FUNNY
-------------
- Person who paid to be in the end crawl ..... Michael Ranch
This space for rent Call 555-2127 for further information
Hollywood Hot Tubs (1984)
- In "The Adventures of Baron Munchausen" (1989) the 'King of
The Moon' is credited as 'Ray DiTutto' (Actually, it was
Robin Williams).
- In the Italian movie, "Cosi" (1996), near the end of the
credits a cast member with an accordian shows up and
performs Wagner's "Ride of the Valkyries" accompanied by a
squealing piglet.
- "Fatal Attraction" (1987) has the credit line "Screenplay by
James Dearden, for the screenplay based on his earlier
screenplay."
- In the opening credits of "The Bed Sitting Room" (1969),
cast members are listed in order of height.
- In "This Is Spinal Tap" (1984) the credits state that the
band Spinal Tap is fictional, and add "And there's no Easter
Bunny, either!"
- The end credits for "Hardware Wars" (1977) state proudly:
"Filmed entirely on location in space."
- "Joe's Apartment" (1996) says "Filmed entirely in New York
City except for one scene we had to go to Newark for."
- The movie, "Brother's Keeper" (1992) has a credit for
"Flash, the editing room dog."
- At the very end of the credits for "Ferris Bueller's Day
Off" (1986), Ferris (Matthew Broderick) comes out of
bathroom and says, "You're still here? It's over. Go home."
- In "Mr. & Mrs. Bridge" (1990) there's a credit:
"Shakespearean Tutor to Mr. Newman - Senator Bob Dole."
- The movie "Jabberwocky" (1977) announced "All characters
portrayed in this film are entirely fictitious and bear no
resemblance to anyone living or dead, except for one."
--:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)-----:-)--
The Taming of the Shrew
by William Shakespeare
Additional Dialog by Sam Taylor
- From the 1928 MGM version of the
Shakespeare Classic
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© 1998 by Bill Becwar. All Rights Reserved.
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